Give and Take: A REVOLUTIONARY APPROACH TO SUCCESS pdf
In this book, I want to persuade you that we underestimate the success of givers like David Hornik.
Although we often stereotype givers as chumps and doormats, they turn out to be surprisingly
To figure out why givers dominate the top of the success ladder, we’ll examine startling
studies and stories that illuminate how giving can be more powerful—and less dangerous—than most people believe.
Along the way, I’ll introduce you to successful givers from many different walks of
life, including consultants, lawyers, doctors, engineers, salespeople, writers, entrepreneurs,
accountants, teachers, financial advisers, and sports executives. These givers reverse the popular plan of succeeding first and giving back later, raising the possibility that those who give first are often best positioned for success later.
But we can’t forget about those engineers and salespeople at the bottom of the ladder. Some
givers do become pushovers and doormats, and I want to explore what separates the champs from the chumps.
The answer is less about raw talent or aptitude, and more about the strategies givers use and
the choices they make.
To explain how givers avoid the bottom of the success ladder, I’m going to debunk two common myths about givers by showing you that they’re not necessarily nice, and they’re not necessarily altruistic.
We all have goals for our own individual achievements, and it turns out that successful givers are every bit as ambitious as takers and matchers. They simply have a different way of pursuing their goals.
This brings us to my third aim, which is to reveal what’s unique about the success of givers. Let
me be clear that givers, takers, and matchers all can—and do—achieve success.
But there’s something distinctive that happens when givers succeed: it spreads and cascades. When takers win, there’s usually someone else who loses. Research shows that people tend to envy successful takers and look for ways to knock them down a notch.
In contrast, when givers like David Hornik win, people are rooting for them and supporting them, rather than gunning for them. Givers succeed in a way that creates a ripple effect, enhancing the success of people around them.
You’ll see that the difference lies in how giver success creates value, instead of just claiming it. As the venture capitalist Randy Komisar remarks, “It’s easier to win if everybody wants you to win. If you don’t make enemies out there, it’s easier to succeed.”
But in some arenas, it seems that the costs of giving clearly outweigh the benefits. In politics, for
example, Mark Twain’s opening quote suggests that diplomacy involves taking ten times as much as giving.
“Politics,” writes former president Bill Clinton, “is a ‘getting’ business. You have to get
support, contributions, and votes, over and over again.”
Takers should have an edge in lobbying and outmaneuvering their opponents in competitive elections, and matchers may be well suited to the constant trading of favors that politics demands.
What happens to givers in the world of politics? Consider the political struggles of a hick who went by the name Sampson…